Cowboys, Guns and Jesus

Today I experienced the Texas trifecta: Guns, Cowboys & Jesus. It started this morning in the doctors lounge at the hospital. I eavesdropped on a conversation between a gynecologist and a few anesthesiologists. This one particular gynecologist has a love for not only vaginas but guns as well. Turns out he even has a federal license to sell guns. He was chatting with these anesthesiologists about the next gun show they'd attend. They excitedly planned out their gun table: the anesthesiologist would be in charge of selling the scopes, they'd have a lovely little glass case for their pistols and they could use some neat little iPhone app to charge the other gun lover's credit cards. I wouldn't be surprised if conversations like this go on all over Texas on any given day, but I perhaps I thought that the more learned brains of physicians wouldn't be sullied by gun fantasies. I suppose I give physicians the benefits of the doubt, thought that maybe they'd rather use their excess cash to fund a medical mission to Africa, take a golf vacation in Scotland, send their kids to private school, or even just pay for a new set of replacement silicone implants for their wives (I always hear that silicone is way more life-like than saline.) I know that its not guns that kill, its people with guns that kill, but I still don't know how one can sleep at night being a firearms vendor. I think I'd feel a sense of responsibility.

Just this past week a 6-year old boy in Houston brought a gun into school. A few days before these doctors discussed their next gun show, flat screen TVs in the very same lounge where they sat today were broadcasting news about this school shooting, wondering if it was done as some sort of copycat shooting during the anniversary of the Columbine massacre in April 11 years ago. I later read in the Houston Chronicle that the 6 year old boy had gotten the gun from some family friend and bought it into school to show off to his friends. He took it out of his pocket and the loaded gun went off by accident. He literally shot himself in the foot and the other bullets ricocheted off the floor and injured a couple other kids. Obviously the irresponsible adults were to blame for leaving a loaded gun accessible to a child. I am sure that the gun-selling doctor would say that if a man wants to buy a gun, he's going to buy it from someone somewhere, so it might as well be from him. I just can't imagine that a vendor wouldn't feel some sort of responsibility knowing that the gun he sold resulted in a death or injury. As much as I try to be open to the idea of gun wielding, I guess I still can't quite support it. I still think guns should be heavily restricted in their sales, use, and ability to be carried. I could easily write a novel on my sentiments of this subject so I shall save that for a later date. Suffice to say, guns are held to be something of a Texas national pride and my liberal ways will likely never warm to this.

I suppose the cowboys all carried guns, and the cowboy ways of old have surely shaped Texans into who they are today. I guess if I lived in a remote cattle ranch a hundred years ago, I might want a gun to defend my land and my cattle from trespassers and predators. Texas is still famous for being the land of cowboys. Every year in March the Houstonians celebrate the Houston Rodeo month by proudly wearing western gear. They have gone as far as calling one particular day "Go Texan Day" where everyone, even hospital staff, dons western clothing head to toe. This year I happened to catch the wagon ride. Dozens of pioneer-type horse drawn wagons rode 100+ miles to arrive in Houston and celebrate their Texan-ness. I'll be the first to admit that I wore my boots with pleasure! The rodeo times of March are behind us now, most of the gear has been placed back in the Texans closets, only to come out for country music concerts or special occasions. I thought of the cowboys today when I was driving behind an over-sized SUV bearing a sticker for the Fellowship of Christian Cowboys. It had a silly slogan, something like "Jesus dun love us too!" The mission of their organization: "Our desire is to use cowboys, cowgirls, and our rich western heritage to reach across this great nation spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ." For a minimum of $45, you two can become an evangelical cowboy! (http://www.christiancowboys.com/index.html)

Jesus-loving cowboys, a perfect transition to the third and final element to the Texas trifecta: God. Religion, namely Christianity, is much more outwardly shared in Texas than the northeast or the west. "God bless" is said often and freely. We have a Jesus TV channel and a Jesus radio station. There are many Jesus loving bumper stickers on the back of pick-up trucks in Texas. I have even seen some vehicles with bilingual Jesus bumper stickers. Crucifix pendants are popular accessories. Houston police direct traffic around the churches on Sunday mornings. We even have mega-churches the size of corporate buildings scattered around town.

Today I had a visit from two Jehovah's witnesses. As I pulled into my driveway I noticed people getting out of a pair of cars. These people were dressed up in ties and business casual clothing. I wondered if they might be there to look at the empty apartment above me. A few moments after there was a knock on the door and there they were. They said that they had seen me pull into the house so they knew I was home...sneaky little bastards! They cut to the chase and told me they were here to tell me about Jehovah. I told them that I was quite familiar with their religion as I have had many patients who are Jehovah's witnesses, refusing blood transfusions for their religious beliefs. The man immediately apologized for that, he said he could understand how frustrating that must be for the medical profession. I told them that I would take their brochure but that I was strongly atheist so there wasn't much they could do.

The younger of the two men had been doing most of the talking up until that point, but the older man stepped up further onto my front stoop to try his hand at saving me from damnation. He asked why I was atheist. I wasn't looking for a three hour discussion so I kept it brief and said that I simply did not think that there was any logical explanation for god and that I also disliked how religions all of the world have killed and maimed in the name of god. They both promised me that Jesus has never killed anyone and was peaceful. They also said that Mohammed was a warrior so that is why Muslims are prone to fighting. The older man asked me how I could explain the complexity of the galaxies and millions of stars in the sky or the beauty in the photographs on my wall if it wasn't made by god. At that time I brought over my bible, Richard Dawkin's "God Delusion", and told him that if he wanted the answers to these questions, he should read this book. I briefly mentioned that Darwinism was central to Dawkin's argument against god. He responded that many people have said that Darwin was wrong. I countered that many have tried to refute Darwin's theory for decades but no one has succeeded in breaking them down. I think we all knew we were fighting a losing battle here. They truly did seem to appreciate my time and I got the feeling that most people throw them off the doorstep before they even get a word out. They left me with their cartoonism Watchtower booklet which has goofy grinning renditions of Jesus, Mary and Martha yucking it up at the resurrection. I also got an additional booklet called "Awake!" The November 2010 edition was all about Atheism. "Is Atheism on the march?" the front cover asked. Other highlights from inside included the following articles, "I was raised an atheist," "Is it appropriate to pray to saints?" and "The Macadamia nut, Australia's native delicacy, as well as a short blurb, "Was it designed? The eye of the peacock mantis shrimp." All sure to be amusing reads. Ahh, the joys of Texas living...